Tag Archives: 360 Eldercare Solutions

Easy Way to Connect with Grandparents from Miles Away

Want to connect with your grandmother or grandfather but can’t go the miles to see them and don’t know what to say over the phone?

Stop feeling guilty and start writing! Here are some quick and easy ideas and tips on how to connect and what to say!

Use the US mail, don’t rely on text or email. Send your love and hugs by way of a meaningful postcard, notecard, or short letter.  Include a photo from time to time. Postcards and notes can be enjoyed over and over again and will bring new smiles each time. Plus, your card and photo can be shown with pride to friends, care-partnering staff, and other family members.  Concerned your grandparent can’t see or read your note? They will enjoy holding it close and looking at it and someone else will read it aloud to them.

Don’t overthink what you write! Write a few words to express feelings of love and gratitude. The feelings of love and joy that you create through your cards will flush through an elder’s whole being and stay with them long after your note is read.

Getting started:

  1. Buy an assortment of postcards whenever you travel or buy a box of assorted note cards. When buying note cards, get ones that speak to your grandparent’s interests and preferences. Such as ones with photos or sketches of flowers, or birds, scenery, cats or dogs, or old Americana.
  2. Address and stamp each postcard or envelop. Now your notes are halfway complete!
  3. Write multiple notes at one time and mail them a week or more apart.
  4. To accommodate diminished vision, use large and legible lettering.
  5. Get in the habit of sending one of the cards on a regular basis. Whatever works for your schedule whether it is monthly or weekly or less often. But, do it! You will be glad you did!
  6. When on a short or long trip, send a postcard. Share your adventures. It does not matter that you will be home before the postcard arrives in their mail. Remember, it is your thoughtfulness that counts and the smile that gets delivered.

Thoughts on what to say:

  1. Express your love, give compliments, and share happy times, upbeat memories and emotions. This is particularly important if you are writing to a loved one with dementia. As dementia progresses, an individual is most able to connect through words that trigger emotions and feelings.
  2. Share your adventures through travel postcards! Postcards are great for letting an elder know that you are thinking of them. Remind them of how much you enjoyed going on trips with them when you were little or hearing about their trips to the beach or to the mountains. Thank them for inspiring your love of traveling. Bring your words back to thoughts of your grandparent; remind them how wonderful you think they are, and how much you love them.
  3. For your grandparent who loved to BBQ, bake, or cook amazing Sunday dinners, remind them of your favorite dishes or desserts that only they could prepare. If writing to your grandmother, let her know of your attempts to make it and how it turned out. Tell her it was almost as tasty and pretty as hers and that it was a big hit with your friends. Thank her for teaching you how to make it and sharing her recipes. Tell her how you happily bragged to your friends that it was your grandmother’s recipe! Give her compliments and you are sure to raise a smile.  Let her know if you burned it but will try again. That too will bring a smile.
  4. For a grandparent who was a gardener, get cards with beautiful plants and flowers on the front and remind them how much you enjoyed their fresh flowers, the roses, the iris, or potted geraniums. Let your grandparent know that you can actually still conjure up the scent of their beautiful yellow roses. Add a sprinkle of floral essential oil or perfume to your card.
  5. For the outdoorsman, send postcards of mountains, trails, fishing, and big-sky country.
  6. To the grandparent who could repair anything, share a story of something you repaired!
  7. If you’re a student, update your grandparent on your studies. They will be proud of your accomplishments. Share your favorite subject, especially, if that subject is important to your grandparent.

Whatever you write, focus on helping your grandparent enjoy the moment! That is the most meaningful and loving way to stay connected from afar.

The feel-good moments you create will be enjoyed repeatedly – each time they pull your card from their pocket, desk, or bag, they will have another opportunity to enjoy it and smile.

Your cards and words will help your grandparent stay engaged in your life, give their life added meaning, and both of you will benefit from the loving feelings expressed.

 For more good ideas on how to stay connected with a loved one, go to www.360eldersolutions.com or contact, Sue S. Wilson, LMSW at sue@360eldersolutions.com to make an appointment for a free initial 30-minute consultation.  Sue is a Certified Trainer for AGE-u-cate® Training Institute.  

http://www.360eldersolutions.com

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Creating Collages with Elders Living with Dementia

IMG_9448Our guest blogger is AGE-u-cate Master Trainer, Sue Wilson, LMSW, CADDCT, CDP  –  360 Elder Solutions (www.360eldersolutions.com)

In this article you’ll learn how to use collage making as a creative means to engage with your loved one living with dementia and enable their voice. You do not have to be an artist to enjoy the benefits of collage making. Making a collage involves choosing images, shapes, and ‘bits and pieces’, then arranging them, and gluing them onto a surface. Collages can be wildly complicated, beautifully simple, or anywhere in between. It’s the opportunities to make choices, express preferences and feelings, and create that empowers an individual and give them voice. Over time, brain changes caused by Alzheimer’s and other dementias diminish language abilities making it progressively harder to engage with others. It becomes more difficult to understand the spoken words of others and to verbally express personal preferences, needs, thoughts and feelings. Losing the ability to effectively communicate can cause frustration and isolation and lead to anger, loneliness and boredom. Art provides a positive and meaningful way to communicate when words are not readily available. Supplies Gather an assortment of meaningful items that communicate your loved one’s current and past interests and preferences. Collages can be made from just about anything and do not require a trip to the craft store. Step outside, into your garage, or look in your “everything” drawer! Gather items that are appealing and will help tell a story. Such as:

• Photos of family members, a favorite car, images and items related to past military service, employment and hobbies, school days, honors earned, celebrations, a favorite pet are elements of life stories for reminiscing and person-­‐centered care.

• For gardeners and nature buffs, gather fresh or dried leaves, dirt, seeds and blossoms to add life and texture to collages. Collect colorful and interesting treasures on a nature walk.

• Gather old magazines, color tissue paper, ribbons, fabric scraps and even old ties, large buttons, construction paper, crayons, and markers from around the house. Or, if needed pick some up at the grocery store.

• Sprinkle a few drops of vanilla, lavender, peppermint, or citrus essential oils on the fabric squares to engage the sense of smell. Apply favorite spices, perfumes or colognes.

  • Have glue sticks for paper, or glues for fabric or wood items.

• Stray puzzle pieces, scrabble letters, dominoes, playing cards and other game pieces.

• Poster board and construction paper work well as surfaces for paper collages, but use a sturdier surface when incorporating embellishments.

• Grow and vary collage supplies to meet and engage changing abilities, interest and preferences.

Set up

• Minimize distractions.

• Decide what you are going to glue the collage onto.

• Set out a variety of papers, images, bits and pieces and see what sparks interest. What is of interest today may not be interesting tomorrow.

• Items can be grouped into themes and placed in separate baskets and brought out on different occasions.

• Help get things started with positive comments and simple instructions. It can be difficult for individuals in later stages of dementia to get started so start by sifting through images and pieces, ask for help in selecting items and with arranging them onto the surface.

• Wait for a response and create the opportunity for reminiscence.

• As time goes on, an individual living with dementia is more apt to recognize faces and places from young adulthood, teenage years, and early childhood, which trigger early emotional thoughts and feelings.

• Images can be torn or cut from magazines and catalogues, same with strips or shapes of paper. Photocopies work as well as original photos.

• The possibilities are endless.

Do:

• Relax. It is as important for you to lay down sweet memories of your loved one now as it is for them to have your presence and company in the now.

• Pay attention to what sparks interest.

• Reminisce enjoyable moments and give compliments when looking at photos and images. For example: o How handsome or beautiful they look in a particular photo. o How proud you are of them for the award they received. o How well they played golf or when they got a hole in one. o Describe the smell and taste of the amazing chocolate cake they made – say something like “I think that was your mother’s recipe.”  How fun and exciting it was when you were out on the lake and they caught that giant trout. o Your compliments will help them enjoy their feelings associated with images, textures or scents.

• Pay attention to when your loved one starts tiring.

• Keep supplies handy and growing so art becomes a regular part of your rhythm and routine.

• Make note of items most enjoyed, changing abilities and moods.

• Display collages and share as gifts. These will become lasting treasures.

Don’t

  • Overwhelm with too many choices.
  •  Hurry the process or take over. It is all about the process and not the product. • Ask your loved one if they remember the name of a particular person or place.
  • Put your loved one on the spot by reminding them of what they do not remember.
  • For more ideas of using creative expression and art to engage your loved one in meaningful activities, contact Sue S. Wilson, LMSW, CADDCT, CDP at sue@360eldersolutions.com and visit her website at www.360eldersolutions.com.

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