Category Archives: Family Caregiver

Dementia Live, Family Caregiver, Senior Care Professionals

The Beautiful Harmony of Caring and Compassion for Elders

1 Comment

We all like to think that have compassion for others don’t we?   After all, we give care, so we must have empathy.  Is there a difference between caring and true compassion?

Caring for another person is is an act of displaying kindness and concern for others.  It is the work or practice of looking after those unable to care for themselves, especially sick or elderly people.

Compassion is a form of emotional engagement that is beneficial to patient care.  Compassion involves the  sharing of feelings of another as a means of coming to an understanding and appreciation for how they feel.

Can we provide adequate care to someone else without being compassionate?  Unfortunately I believe our standards of care for elderly, disabled and sick individuals have focused on care without the importance of compassion, empathy and understanding.

If empathy involves emotional engagement with someone else, it also involves understanding their world.  We can care for someone by providing for needs but not necessarily moving into their world, walking in their shoes and sharing in their struggles, joys and challenges.

When compassion and caring merge, care partners build trust, form deeper and more meaningful relationships and go beyond physical needs to digging deeper in understanding and meeting emotional and spiritual needs.

Compassion training, especially for those caring for someone with dementia, chronic illness, pain and end-of-life can empower both care partners, families and communities in which they live.

Educating families and professionals in understanding and helping those they care for cope with their challenges starts with empathy, compassion and understanding for what that person is dealing with.  When a care giver gains empathy, their world merges with those they are caring for in new and wonderfully positive ways for both partners.

Take time to learn the art of compassion and mover from a caregiver to a compassionate caregiver.   Leaders, embrace compassion training for staff and families.  Everyone is better served with more compassionate caregivers.

Pam Brandon is President/Founder of AGE-u-cate® Training Institute and a passionate advocate for elders and those that serve them.  Pam is the creator of the Dementia Live™️ simulation program that helps caregivers increase understanding , compassion and empathy for those living with cognitive impairment.  

www.AGEucate.com

Faith Community, Family Caregiver, Senior Care Professionals

How Can We Embrace the Fact that Death is a Part of Life?

1 Comment

We all know that the only thing certain about our life is that someday it will end.  And yet death continues to be an elusive topic in most families and social circles.  Someone recently shared with me that she felt if she brought up the topic with her parents,  they might feel like she wanted to hurry things along.

Do we fear the inevitable that much?  Or do we instead fear the journey to that “end” point?

Kelvin H. Chin, Executive Director, Overcoming the Fear of Death Foundation says the fear of the PROCESS of dying is not the same as the fear of death. It is a common fear, and is closely related, but it is not the actual fear of death itself.

 

Studies do in fact verify that people fear that their pain, symptoms, anxiety, emotional suffering, and family concerns will be ignored. Many critically ill people who die in hospitals still receive unwanted distressing treatments and have prolonged pain. Many fear that their wishes (advance directives) will be disregarded and that they will face death alone and in misery. Physicians may use confusing or vague medical terms and talk briefly about treatment options when the patients are too sick to participate. Most people want to discuss advance directives when they are healthy and often want their families involved.

Attitude are changing about end-of-life care and death with many forward thinkers aiming to empower people  facing the end of their lives.  The National Hospice and Palliative Care Organization explains this movement as an effort “to de-medicalize and re-personalize the end-of-life experience.

As more families are educated on hospice and palliative care and the holistic approach that emphasizes acceptance, comfort and counseling over deployment of life extending medical measures, I believe more of us will be less fearful of the process, seeing it as more humanistic and gentle.

While the tide is turning slowly, it is my hope that health professionals and families will approach death as a part of life and one that when discussed openly and honestly will change our culture and attitudes about how we honor wishes, create moments of joy and lift unnecessary burdens along the way.

Pam Brandon is President/Founder of AGE-u-cate® Training Institute.  A passionate advocate for older adults and those that serve them,  she embraces transformative change in elder care.  

www.AGEucate.com

www.nhpco.org

Faith Community, Family Caregiver, Senior Care Professionals

Why are my parents suddenly so stubborn?

1 Comment

The Big “S” word.  It comes up more often than you would think and for good reason.  Adult children who are in any phase of caregiving for their parents, even in the very beginning stages share their frustrations of their parents suddenly being stubborn.   Why is this happening?

Let’s think about the role reversal that is taking place, either gradually over time or suddenly due to a  change in physical or cognitive health.  This role reversal leads to confusion and is never a natural shift for adult children, spouses or other loved ones.  As difficult as this is for the caregiver it much harder for the care receiver.

What is actually happening and why does stubborn behavior from even the most agreeable of people send shock waves through the family?  Imagine if you will, what it might feel like to witness yourself the lack of independence taking place in your own life.  It might be in the form of having someone telling you that it’s time to stop driving, that someone may need to start helping you bathe, “helping” pay your bills or accompany you to regular doctor visits.

It doesn’t matter what the level is at which children, spouses or others find themselves in the position to help out, all of these point to one huge signal to the one needing assistance -loss of independence, decision making and privacy!  For older adults that have had a lifetime of child-rearing, careers, active lives of giving and nurturing others, imagine what it feels like to have someone ( a loved one no less!) tell you that it’s time to turn in the keys.

Like all behaviors, there is an underlying reason.  Underneath a stubborn older adult is someone clinging to what independence they can shelter for themselves, the fear of what tomorrow will bring,  and sadness for what they are leaving behind.

As families struggle with this stubborn syndrome, please step into the shoes of the person you are trying to help.  Kindness, gentleness and empathy go a long way in dealing with difficult life changes.  Family meetings that include the care receiver (if this is possible) is always advised.

Above all, caregivers should be educated and seek help from others who are traveling the same road.  Be prepared for this stubborn behavior to be a new normal, but also know that with the right approach, you can get through the hurdles together and get through this journey with strength and grace.

Pam Brandon is President/Founder of AGE-u-cate® Training Institute.  A passionate advocate for older adults and those that care for them, Pam is a dynamic speaker, trainer and facilitator and has worked with thousands of caregivers, older adults and hundreds of organizations to help others through the caregiving journey.  

www.AGEucate.com

 

Dementia Live, Family Caregiver, Senior Care Professionals

Can we rebuild the brain? Neuroplasticity and Brain/Body Fitness

2 Comments

(Society for Neuroscience) The discovery that the human brain can produce new cells in adulthood offers just one example of how adaptable the brain is throughout life. With this knowledge, researchers are investigating how normal aging as well as neurodegenerative diseases like Alzheimer’s disease affect that adaptability, and how we can maintain healthy brain function as our brains age.  So what is neuroplasticity?

(Brainworksneurotherapy.com/uk)

Our brains are constantly being shaped by experience. Most of us have very different behaviours and thoughts today than we did 20 years ago. This shift is neuroplasticity in action; changes in brain structure and organisation as we experience, learn, and adapt.

With every repetition of a thought or emotion, we reinforce a neural pathway – and with each new thought, we begin to create a new way of being. These small changes, frequently enough repeated, lead to changes in how our brains work.

Neuroplasticity is the ‘muscle building’ part of the brain; the things we do often we become stronger, and what we don’t use fades away. That is the physical basis of why making a thought or action over and over again increases its power. Over time, it becomes automatic; a part of us. We literally become what we think and do.

Neuroplasticity is at work throughout life. Connections within the brain are constantly becoming stronger or weaker, depending on what is being used. Younger people change easily; their brains are very plastic. As we age change doesn’t come as easily; the brain loses some of its plasticity and we become more fixed in how we think, learn, and perceive.

Since the brain is pivotal to all we think and do, by harnessing neuroplasticity we can improve everything we do and think.

We know that exercise for the body is critical to maintaining bone and muscular structure, cardiovascular health and blood flow. Now we know these same benefits can be applied to the brain, and that “remolding” in our brain can take place with throughout life, even into “old” age.  This science is opening new doors to exciting research and hope for  keeping our brains healthy as we age,   and even helping those with neurodegenerative conditions such a Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s Disease.

Pam Brandon is President/Founder of AGE-u-cate® Training Institute, whose mission lies in creating transformative change in an aging world.  AGE-u-cate’s newest partnership with Ageless Grace® – 21 Simple Tools for Lifelong Comfort and Ease™️ is their ongoing commitment to helping people of all ages with a groundbreaking body/brain  fitness program.  

www.AGEucate.com/Ageless Grace